Friend or foe, fan or basher, you all know me well enough to know that my column in the Oct. 19 edition was not written in my own “voice” until the final few graphs. However, I made a major gaffe. We live in the Internet age and one Google hit from a research assistant for a self-important member of the national media could create a wrong impression.

I had a line in the column referring to the vision I pretended to have for a Barack Obama presidency being as frightening as seeing some of the female talking heads that have dominated our television screens since the Iowa caucuses competing in a bikini contest.

I had already mentioned some of their male counterparts, so I thought I’d keep it fair. A female editor, one with an actual sense of humor who also knew I was coming from a totally satirical standpoint, helped me shape the list.

The last name added, begrudgingly, was that of Greta Van Susteren. Little did I know that Greta – or someone from Greta’s staff – would pounce of my fumble and run with it.

Not one the generally positive responses I’ve received on the column from within the readership even mentioned the ill-fated paragraph, but Greta and the flock of fans that read her blog took that one sentence out of context and drew the brilliant conclusion that I was a “sexist pig.”

If that is true, have pity on the rest of the county. I am a lot of things, maybe even a pig when it comes to chow time, but sexist is not among them.

All that any of them had to do was search our online archives and learn that I spent the first three to four months of this year as an ardent supporter of Hillary Clinton and her bid to become the first female president of the United States.

And I wasn’t doing it to ingratiate myself with women – as some secret “sexist pigs” in my profession do – as I rarely, if ever, mentioned her gender.

As with Obama’s skin pigmentation or John McCain’s age, at least until he picked an unqualified running mate (gender notwithstanding) to be waiting in the wings should his health fail, it was a non-issue.

Regular readers have also probably grown weary of my constant in-print gushing over my daughter, Sofia. If I prayed, I would pray for a day when I could tell her that she could be anything she wants to be one day – even president.

The only thing she can’t do is date until she is 30. That’s because I know how many real sexist pigs are out there.

I do want to apologize to those in the Greta Nation, but not for the sentence in question. That was a mistake because it wasn’t necessary in the overall scheme and theme of the column and it apparently took out-of-town readers’ eyes off the ball.

Instead, I want to apologize for the way Greta – as a way to “have some fun on a Sunday morning” – sunk to my level and asked her followers to picture me in a Speedo.

That wasn’t a nice thing to do, Greta. What a horrible picture. I would never inflict such a horrid sight on anyone – even people who think Obama is terrorist spy and/or the anti-Christ.

What I find interesting, however, is that Greta didn’t find me so homely back in late December of 2006 and January of 2007.

That’s when she had me on as a guest multiple times – and I shunned several of her competitors to do so – to feed the passing morbid curiosity of her viewers following the death of Ellen Robb at the hands of her Penn professor husband, Rafael.

I wasn’t quite sure what made this a national story at the time, as it was clear Robb was stone-cold guilty.

It was all about ratings, and Greta – great journalist that she is – needed hers.

And I helped.

A local competitor with a lot less knowledge of the case than I had, made a fool of himself on the “Nancy Grace Show” after I told them I was sticking with Greta when they came calling.

The last time I taped a segment for Greta, I stood out in the bitter cold in front of Montgomery County prison after Robb was thrown in the slammer. I listened in my headphones as she interviewed Donald Trump about the hard-hitting story of a dethroned beauty pageant contestant.

Her other “hot story” at the time was about rival cheerleader moms in Texas. Wow!

After that night, I never heard from heard from Greta’s producers again. The story was old news.

The producer promised to get me a disc of the final segment to save for my showing my daughter one day (Note: I was volunteering my time while my wife was pregnant) and to have a few laughs at my own expense once the cameras focused on other tragedies of white women.

I can be self-effacing. Greta, although she tried to act like she didn’t care about my “bikini contest” sentence but that she felt for “friend” Candy Crowley, clearly felt dissed and lashed out.

And she’s right about Crowley of CNN. She is a quality journalist. Perhaps she could even give Greta some interviewing tips because that one-on-one with Todd Palin a few weeks back was an embarrassment to the profession.

But we have to consider the source.

Greta and her great staff never followed up on the Robb case. If they did, they would know that he could literally get a way with murder -- as a potentially ultra-light sentence awaits.

During the World Series rain delay Monday, we had “On The Record” on the newsroom and Greta’s exchange with Rush Limbaugh – you know, the pill addict no one would want to see in a Speedo who once delivered to Donovan McNabb a sickening cheap shot – equated to borderline phone sex.

Wait, I take that back. That was mean. It wasn’t “fair and balanced.”

Let’s stick to the facts.

Greta, you have a short memory. You have now given me two-thirds of my allotment of 15 minutes of fame.

Something tells me our paths will cross again. Maybe the third time -- those last five minutes -- will be the charm.

Until then, don’t go hosting a show on the most biased news network on the dial and think you can tell anyone how to be a journalist.

Still, you have taught me a valuable lesson. A writer can’t bank on past history with any reader in the year 2008.

Therefore, let’s lay the proverbial cards on the table and be done with it.

Once I pick a side, I stay with it. That’s why, for example, I stayed with Greta during the Robb-fest

I was behind John Edwards at the outset of the race for the White House, but he jumped ship pretty fast. All for the best, given his dirty little secret.

I then weighed the field and jumped on Hillary Clinton’s train and was one of the strongest media supporters she had in this part of Pennsylvania (see “A Woman’s Got The Power” on this blog for background reading, all you self-loathing members of Greta Nation who think you know me so well from one line from one column).

I wrote a lot of negative words about Obama and found myself with a tough choice once it came down to him and McCain, whom I used to respect more than any Republican out there.

After a long night -- and really for the basic reason that more than eight years of a president from either party being in the big chair isn’t healthy for the country -- I tentatively went with Obama.

Since then, my faith in him has grown as much as it has diminished for McCain.

But I don’t see Obama as the ideal candidate. There are holes in his game – albeit holes that can be filled if surrounded with the right Cabinet and advisers, which he is intelligent and secure enough in himself to procure.

What I won’t stand for – if I can help it – is him being Swift-Boated out of this election with the multiple silly scenarios I lumped together in the column that caught the eye of ... someone in Greta’s camp who passed it along to her for blog fodder.

I know this doesn’t settle it, and I doubt Greta will have the fairness to pick up this response and run it whole on her site/blog, but at least I can go to bed tonight thinking I’ve gotten in the last word.

At this point, it may help the Phillies more if Game 5 of the World Series remain in suspended animation until Wednesday. That gives them more time to get past the fact that they took their collective foot off the the throat of the once-beaten Rays and, in turn, it gives the Ray more time to to put their min-comeback in perspective.

Plus, if the series went back to Tampa for Games 6 and 7, which I presume would be Friday and Saturday, Hamels could be ready to pitch Game 7.

Objectively, we are tied with 3 1/2 innings to go and Tampa needs to win three times in a row.

But this is Philadelphia - stranger things have not happened, but usually not in our favor ...

It's been a long 25 years ...

I'm still chanting the Philadelphia sports fan prayer of consolation: Hope for the best, but expect the worst.

And a Philadelphia team -- albeit not the one nearest and dearest to my shredded soul -- is one win away from ending the drought.

Whenever I think about it, I get those same "tiny little heart attacks" that Pvt. Eugene Morris Jerome felt when he said the name "Daisy Hannigan" in "Biloxi Blues" (see it, good movie). Some things are more important than politics and sports is one of them. I'd trade a Phillies win tonight, Wednesday or Thursday for a John McCain win next Tuesday.

It's been a long 25 years ....

We taped an episode of "Behind The Headlines" Thursday and panelist/contributing columnist Lisa Mossie -- who is always gracious enough to take time out of her day to join us every two weeks -- showed up at Norristown Area High School looking very much like the cat who ate the canary.

She was pumped about some comment Democratic Veep hopeful Joe Biden purportedly uttered on the campaign stump about the Obama-Biden team being tested early by an international crisis within the first six months.

Somehow, like most on the increasingly desperate right, she saw this as some sort of epiphany by the free-talking Biden and a waving of the white flag from the likely winners of this historic and marathon race.

She even gave Biden a thumbs-up for saying what he said and threw in that Colin Powell said something similar (didn't even come close, unless you go through life conviniently taking only literal meanings from everything anyone ever says).

As per usual on "show" days, when I'm worried about camera people signaling for a commercial break and making sure everyone stays involved, she had me at a disadvantage. Busy changing diapers before heading over to the taping, I didn't have the luxury of hearing what either purportedly said to make her so giddy.

My follow-up research from legitimate sources -- not hateful right-wing e-mail chains or talk-radio nutcases -- confirmed my immediate suspicions.

Biden's remarks were take so far out of context that she should come on the next show and apologize, even though that word is not in her vocabulary. Like a good right-wing foot solider, she utters a falsehood with confidence and hopes the ordinary Joes and Joannes are swayed.

It's on Page 1 of the Conservative Playbook.

What Biden said was that he wouldn't be surprised if the Obama presidency were tested but that the administration, one that will be filled with actual experts and not sycophants whose job it is to make an insecure president feel better about himself, would pass the test and ease fears of a public rightfully wary about Obama's experience.

The irony of the whole argument is that many on the right blame President Bill Clinton, not the current resident of the White House, for what happened Sept. 11. They say that the attacks were planned on Clinton's watch, so he is to blame.

So, if there is an attack planned early in an Obama presidency, wouldn't the same logic hold true?

The reality is that the same people doing a stoic job on the ground to prevent a terror attack are not going to be asked to turn in their guns and badges on Nov. 5 or the day after the next president -- hopefully Obama -- is sworn in to office.

My gut instinct, I hate to say it, is that an attack is being planned to greet the new president -- whether it is an old white man who spent time as a POW or a young black man who was the president of Harvard Law Review -- sometime in 2009. It may or may not be thwarted, but it is being plotted and planned as we sip our Green Tea and watch "Dancing With The Stars" (a Mossie favorite pastime, along with goading friends and relatives to vote for her on our "Vote for your favorite TH columnist poll.)

These terrorist attacks are like forces of natures -- like hurricanes, tornadoes, earthquakes, etc. -- that can't really be stopped once they develop a mind of their own.

If they are meant to happen, they will.

It is how the man at the top reacts that makes him a leader worthy of respect; a leader worthy of his name being spoken or written.

I have more confidence that Obama would use his superior intellect and proven ability to rely on a trusted and diverse inner circle than I do in a guy who rubber-stamped the actions of He Whose Name Shall Not Be Written -- or spoken -- the last time around

Apparently, Colin Powell does, too.

As for my friend, Lisa, she would have been better off showing up for the show with a black eye and backward "B" carved in her face.

Believe it or not, it would have been more believable than her fairy tale about Biden (although I fear his loose lips still could sink the ship in a country that lives on snippets and not the full story).

I recently had -- or at least attempted -- to have a political discourse with my mother and my stepfather.

They have come to the brilliant conclusion that seeking absentee ballots from Florida was not worth the trouble because neither Barack Obama nor John McCain do much for them.

That is code, of course, for saying they really like Obama but wouldn't vote for him for reasons that are ... skin-deep?

Don't get me wrong. I didn't grow up in a racist household. But a president of the country, as opposed to a university or a union or something easier to swallow, seems beyond the comprehension of many somewhat sane people in this generation.

When mentioned this, my mother scoffed.

She said she would vote for Colin Powell in a heartbeat. When I asked why, I got the reaction I rarely get from her. She was muted -- for almost a full 18 1/2 seconds.

That was a few days ago.

This morning, we heard from Powell. The once-respected military man took the first step in redeeming a rep that will be forever tarnished for getting tangled in the web of lies spun by the current administration.

Powell endorsed Obama.

My prediction is that once there is a new president -- and it still seems likely that it will be Obama (although the Boston Red Sox have proven that comebacks do happen, particularly when they are like Viagra for the media) -- Powell will continue clearing his name and we will learn the true level of deceit perpetrated upon us in a buildup to a unnecessary war that put our economy on the road to ruin.

Trooper-gate, Schmooper-gate.

It doesn't really matter all that much to me.

When it comes to Sarah Palin and her qualifications to theoretical be vice-president, there is enough there -- or not there -- to go on.

We need not dwell on some small-state political maneuvering.

The state trooper -- Palin's former brother-in-law (everyone is probably related up there) -- sounds like a tool. Id' use some other four-letter words, but we're trying to nice here

She sought to use her position to take care of her own. I'm not condoning it; just cutting to the core of a non-story that would not have even reached a newspaper or broadcast outside of Alaska if she were not laughably tabbed to be John McCain's running mate.

Trooper-gate, Schmooper-gate.

It doesn't really matter all that much to me.

I suppose you all assume that I'll be there, front and center, at the free Bruce Springsteen concert on the Parkway Saturday afternoon.

Well, we all know what happens when you assume.

Nothing in this life is free.

Can one put a price tag on the headache of having to get down there, find parking and get situation somewhere within listening distance of the show?

But that's not really it. Saturdays (particularly when an Eagles home game is going to put me out of pocket all day Sunday) are reserved for family time, and Sofia -- at 18 months -- is quite a few years shy of going to concerts, or Eagles games, with her mommy and daddy.

Even though one of my minions secured me a ticket that allegedly gives an attendee and a better spot amidst the chaos -- and even though another made sure my name was on a media list that is probably as long as the list of Sarah Palin's factual errors from the VP debate -- it is doubtful I'll be there.

I'm all behind the event. I hope Bruce and the band play 4 hours and convert some of those who aren't that into his music and are only going because of the overall vibe, but I'm going to have to sit this one out.

Some things are more important -- even more than Bruce Springsteen, who I wish would stop torturing me with these concerts (we'll make an exception for Obama's inaugural ball) and go back home and crank out an album.

BEEP, BEEP, BEEP: This just in from POLITICO ...

John McCain is pulling out of Michigan, according to two Republicans, a stunning move a month away from Election Day that indicates the difficulty Republicans are having finding blue states to put in play.

McCain will go off TV in Michigan, stop dropping mail there and send most of his staff to more competitive states, including Wisconsin, Ohio and Florida. Wisconsin went for Kerry in 2004, Ohio and Florida for Bush.

McCain's campaign didn't immediately respond to a request for comment.

Republicans had been bullish on Michigan, hopeful that McCain's past success in the state in the 2000 primary combined with voter dissatisfaction with Democratic Gov. Jennifer Granholm and skepticism among blue-collar voters about Barack Obama could make it competitive.

McCain and his running mate Sarah Palin spent the night after the GOP convention at a large rally in Macomb County, just outside Detroit. The two returned later last month for another sizable event in Grand Rapids.

But recent polls there have shown Obama extending what had been a small lead, with the economic crisis damaging an already sagging GOP brand in a state whose economy is in tatters.

A McCain event planned for next week in Plymouth, Michiigan, has been canceled.

AND THE TIDE CONTINUES TO TURN!

PEACE OUT!